The Cave

The cave has a large spiritual aura over itself. When I first came in touch with spirituality at the age of 15 the concept with the cave was a frequent topic that was mentioned throughout the talks I had with certain people in those days. I did not really understand what it meant more then it being some sort of spiritual retreat, being away from people. When I asked if a physical absent was meant I was sometimes given the answer yes, sometimes no, without any further details. But the term was brought once in a while when my spiritual friends where sad or fed up with the world for whatever reason. The utopia was then to get away from everyone’s sight and retreat into the cave. Now if that was mentally or physically was not clear. As I was a dry thirsty sponge listening and absorbing without asking too much I put the concept of the cave aside in my mind for the future.

Last night, ten years later, dissolved memories of the cave that I had stuffed deep into myself slowly started to come to the surface. An intense craving for the cave arouse within me. Today I had a clear mental vision of my cave, waiting for me to retreat into. I cannot claim I still truly grasp the concept of the cave; but what I do know is that I have an intense urge to walk into it and found out.

It reminds me of Imam Ali’s(A) words in Nahjul Balagha when he says that there are some believers whose bodies walk on the earth while their souls walk in the heavens. It does sound like some celestial cave when you think about it.

Ibn Arabi also touches the cave when he speaks of “khalwa” – solitude. In his words solitude doesn’t necessarily mean physical loneliness or social absence; a greater form of khalwa is the solitude of the heart irrespective of where the body is. Even though I’d love to use one bodily part to manifest for the world and its people what anguish that torments my heart, namely the middle finger, I do realize that is not compatible with emptying the heart. On the contrary that would mean filling the heart with smoke and fury which makes it a bit hard to breath.

The train stationen in Lund 11/11/11 at 11:11 - "I have for long thought about meditating among people and traffic", says Jenny A Wenhammar. (Photo by Yvonne Johansson. Click to read full story.)

So when Ibn Arabi speaks of emptying the heart, a relevant question is: to whom? Is the purpose to stay empty or to prepare it for something? Or perhaps someone? Well here the words of Imam Khomeini in his “Adabu Salat” come in mind. He means that purging the heart of impurities is one level, but a level higher is to buil a mosque on the purified inner land of the heart:

And, after purging himself [the spiritual traveller] from self-love and getting out of his own fetters, he himself will become the house of Allah, or better to say, he will become the mosque of the Lord, and Allah will glorify Himself through Manifestation of Action, then of Names and of Essence in that mosque, and this glorification is the salat of the Lord, saying: subbuhun quddus, rabbul mala ‘ikati war ruh [All-Glorious, All-Holy, the Lord of the angels and the spirit).

Imam Khomeini, Adabu Salat, About Knowing the Place

The some what ironic part in all of this is that once you seclude, once you are connected to the Lord of the Worlds, you are meant to be sent back to the people to guide them to the seclusion without losing yourself on the way. To your aid you do have the Lord by your side. But I have reached the conclusion that the divine backup isn’t a guarantee; rather it is a relationship that must be nurtured because if it isn’t you will drift apart. While trying to lead others you actually mislead yourself. It does sound like the typical ingredient which usually turns marriages into joy or tragedy, doesn’t it? Life is a strange thing, almost bizarre, and the world we live in is indeed a maze.

I do not know what to do or how to find the way. Rather I’m at the verging point of stop looking at the outside and start retreating into myself, whatever that now means. As I write this my middle finger is itching. In fact it is screaming in my fist. I think it wants to be unleashed and liberated so it can stand erect with all its might and attitude. I better put a restraining order on it, cross my fingers and start looking for my cave.

Do you have a cave to retreat into? How is it?